Why was Long Bailey sacked?

Hot on the heels of Sir Keir Starmer’s sacking of Rebecca Long Bailey as shadow Education Secretary, Gavin Williamson, the actual Education Secretary, is reported to have told the Tory 1922 backbench committee that he is to cease consulting with the teachers unions about the safe opening of schools. Williamson is reported as saying he will get children back to school in September “come what may”.

Long Bailey was supposedly sacked for tweeting a link to an interview with Maxine Peake on the Independent website which contained a brief comment linking Israeli security services with the infamous knee-on-neck hold used by US police. She has, however, been a supporter of the National Education Union (NEU) and its opposition to under-controlled school re-opening  and is supportive of modern teaching methods.

In a further attempt to curry favour with the most reactionary elements in the Tory Party, Williamson said he wants all children to face the front of the classroom when schools reopen in September. He had been shocked to discover that in many classrooms children were actually sitting at round or square tables facing one another!  Apparently unaware of current teaching practice (let alone Covid-19 distancing requirements) or the substantial volume of research in this area, he considers it “wrong” and wants “the class to pay attention to the teacher” when schools reopen. Quite what he thinks has been going on in classrooms since the days of Cider with Rosie is perplexing. Perhaps he has been spending too much time talking to Amanda Spielman, the should-have-been-furloughed Head of Ofsted who has had nothing to do since schools closed than go around expressing her reactionary views. Or is he recalling his time as a Defence Secretary until he was sacked by Theresa May in 2019 for leaking classified documents? As Defence Secretary he might be dimly recalling the traditional army method of teaching soldiers how to dismantle and re-assemble a bren gun:

  • show’em once
  • show’em twice
  • show’em three times
  • get them to do it
  • shout at them when they get it wrong.

if it worked for soldiers, why not children?

 

Meanwhile, what was Starmer up to? Did he sack Long Bailey to:

clear out the last Corbynite from the Shadow Cabinet and return to New Labour principles?

move Labour education policy back to more traditional methods?

appease the pro-Israel lobby?

distance Labour from the NEU resistance to precipitate school re-opening?

ensure Labour is not seen as hindering the wider re-opening the economy?

Perhaps it was one of those occasions when a multiplicity of discreditable ambitions could be furthered with a single discreditable action.

THE REAL NIGHTMARE

The first thing on our minds when we now wake up in the middle of the night isn’t, of course, Covid-19 or even the health of our Prime Minister, it is relief that we have not been nuked as we slept by the dastardly Chinese or Russians. What better opportunity could they have than now when we are all being ravaged by a virus? We can, however, turn over and go back to sleep, content in the knowledge that Dominic Raab (or Keir Starmer, if he has mysteriously become Prime Minister in the middle of the night) is willing to push the Red Button and avenge us posthumously, even at the personal cost of becoming a genocidal mass murderer .

Throughout the coronavirus pandemic, one of our four nuclear missile-armed submarines has been at sea. The far-sighted people at the Admiralty have even taken Covid-19 into account. If only others in government had been so far sighted! Crews are now held in quarantine ahead of the deployment, so that, it is hoped, none of them develop the symptoms while at sea. As a further precaution, the crew currently at sea are thought not to have been told about the pandemic. This is so that they are not distracted by a fellow submariner with a cough from the business in hand: targeting their rockets on China, Russia and North Korea and the potential need to re-program them quickly to hit Iran (France and Israel, although nuclear armed, are presumably exempt).

CND has calculated that replacing Trident, Britain’s nuclear weapons system will cost at least £205 billion. See https://cnduk.org/resources/205-billion-cost-trident/ . Money well spent for a good night’s sleep!

Before returning to sleep with these reassuring thoughts in your head, don’t however dwell on the possibility that the USA might have sold us the systems with a disabling mechanism hidden within them. That would only give you feverish nightmares in which Mr Raab or Mr Starmer repeatedly stab at the Red Button and nothing happening while a ginger haired President sits in the White House and smirks.